Santa Banta SMS 4

Banta: Did you have a chance 2 sleep with my wife?
Santa: What are you saying? I’d never even think about such thing.
Banta: you might want to. She’s much better then yours.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Banta to a Doctor : I have diarrhoea & it wont go away.
Doctor: Did you try using a lemon?
Banta: Yes I did. When I remove it, it starts again.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Jeeto was about to give birth to a baby.
Santa: If it looks like you, it would be great.
Jeeto: If it looks like you, it would be a miracle.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Santa touched Jeeto's boobs and sung: Piyo glass full doodh, wonderful doodh.
Jeeto touched his penis and said: Thanda matlab CHOTA COKE!

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Santa: Oye Banta don't marry that girl, she is like a TAXI.
Banta: Choti si to city hai yaar... kitni chali hogi?

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Santa: My 8yr old son is very naughty, he has made my maid servant pregnant.
Confused Banta: How the hell?
Santa: He took a pin & punctured all my condoms.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

During sex Jeeto asks repeatedly: Do you love me, do you really love me? Irritated Santa: What the hell do you think, I am doing pushups?

Category: Santa Banta SMS

How does a vagina look before sex?
Like a pink rose with soft petals & great aroma.
And after sex?
Have you ever seen Santa's face after he drinks lassi?

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Pappu sees his parents having sex.
Pappu: Papa, kya kar rahe ho?
Santa: Petrol bhar raha hoon.
Pappu: Avg check karaao, abhi to Banta uncle dal kar gaye hain.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

In a party, a lady wanted to go to toilet. She said to Santa: Susu karne ki jagah dikhaao.
Santa: you naughty girl, pehle tum dikhaao.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Santa standing in balcony without shirt.
Banta, "Wah Santa ji kya chest hai.
Santa, "Eh tan kuch nahi andar ja ke apni bharjai di dekh.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Three men discussing wives. 1st says my wife is very cold. 2nd says mine is very hot.
Santa: I'm confused. I think she is cold but people say she's hot.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Pappu: Dad what’s the diff between love, belief & relief.
Santa: your Mom is my love, your maid is my relief & I'm your Dad - well, that's my belief

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Pappu: What's the difference between Confidence and Confidential?
Santa: yo are my son I'm Confident. your friend is also my son, that's Confidential.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Santa: Main ghar jaate hi biwi ki panty utar dunga.
Banta: Yaar tu to bahut mood mein lag raha hai.
Santa: Nahi yaar mujhe bahut tight ho rahi hai.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

In interview, Santa was asked: Who's Monica Seles? A tennis player.
Ok, who's Monica Lewinski?
Penis player.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

The wife was crying in pain as Banta was tryin to fuck her in the ass.
Banta says: Zyada rone ki zaroorat nahin, mujhe pata hai kitna dard hota hai.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Pappu meets Santa on stairs of a KOTHA.
Pappu: Papa aap yahan kya kar rahe ho?
Santa: Yaar ab 200-300 rupaye ke peeche teri mummy ke nakhre nahi sahe jaate!

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Jeeto was going to Chandigarh for vacations. At the time of packing Santa thinks: Kitni bholi hai, main saath nahin jaa raha phir bhi condom saath le jaa rahi hai.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Santa was sukin girlfriend's breasts.
Gal got excited n said: Tussi hor kuch chahney ho?
Santa: Doodh naal biscuit milangey?

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Jeeto: Kal ek aadmi aya aur mere sath sex karke chala gaya.
Santa: Tumne use roka nahi?
Jeeto: Bahut kaha rukne ke liye, bola kal phir aaunga.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Judge: you want to divorce Santa 4 threatening you with a deadly weapon?
Jeeto: No, your honor. I'm divorcing him 4 threatening me every night with a dead weapon.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

A man is doing push ups on the beach. Drunk Santa sees him and starts laughing loudly and says:
Sorry to tell you but the women below you has already left.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Judge: why do you want divorce?
Banta: She doesn't satisfy me in bed!
Preeto: Tu aithey dc lagyan? Sari colony khush aa, ik teri agg nahin bhujdi.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Santa was pissing when a gal saw his huge penis & said naughtily: Wow I would love to have that.
Santa: Go & get a cup, I'm about to finish.

Santa was fondling a lady in a crowded bus.
Lady: Excuse me, aap achha nahi kar rahe hain!
Santa: Itni bheed mein is se achha nahi ho sakta.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Preeto: Suno ji, aaj phir billi dudh pi gayee.
Santa: Main tainu kinni vaari keha hai ki apne blouse de button band karke soya kar.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Santa was asked to give a talk on Sex
He walked to the podium, adjusted the microphone & said: Ladies n Gentlemen, it gives me great pleasure...
And sat back down.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

A female Press Reporter slaps Santa. Banta standing near asks Santa: why did she slap you?
Santa: On her T-shirt was written 'Press', so I just pressed…

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Jeeto goes 2 repair umbrella. The man said: Upar ka kapda nikalna padega, Neeche se danda dalna padega.
Jeeto: Kuch bhi karo but pani andar nahi ana chaiye.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Jeeto: Oh zara dheere karo, kyon Shatabdi chala rahe ho, Maalgadi chalaao.
Itne mein Pappu bed se gira aur bola jo marzi chalaao par sawaari ko to mat giraao.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Why did English teacher slap Santa?
Because Santa asked her: why is Bra is singular when it covers 2 & Panties plural when it covers only one?

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Santa ko susu karta dekh ladki rasta badal kar jaane lagi to Santa bola: O madam, ghabrao mat, tum jisse dar rahi ho usko maine pakad kar rakha hai...!

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Santa and Banta were watching bungee jumping.
Santa: Wanna try it?
Banta: No way. I was born because of broken rubber & I don't wanna die because of it.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

Santa travelling in Virgin Atlantic asked 4 milk. Air hostess put her nipple in his mouth.
Santa: acha hua paani nahi maanga.

Category: Santa Banta SMS

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